Snowball Express VIII

I just want to document my feelings and experiences at this year's Snowball Express while they are fresh.  Do your eyes ever well up when you see something sweet or sad?  What is that?  Sometimes I think I'm feeling the Holy Spirit alive in me.  Other times, I think it's emotions welling up.  Maybe it's both.  

This year has been just as rewarding as last year.  I am helping out more in the kid section rather than teens like I did last year.  It seems to fit me better.  Tonight, there was a little girl sitting by herself so I asked her if she was ok and needed anything.  As I was kneeling down to hear her, she reached up and gave me the biggest hug and started crying.  She missed her Daddy.  It took all I had not to fall apart right there with her.
All I could say was, "I'm so sorry, honey.  What can I do to make you feel better tonight?"

"Just sit here with me."  And she held me so tight, crying and crying.  After a few minutes some other girls she knew came up and gave her big hugs and listened to her, too.

I couldn't say, "I know" because I don't.  I can't imagine!  She was 10 and had lost her Daddy.  I'm nearly 34 and can't imagine losing either one of my parents.  I'm hoping just hugging her back was enough to help until her friends arrive.  They truly are the only ones who can relate to each other enough to say "I know".

Heartbreaking!  However, as I told someone else this weekend...it's work that I treasure doing because it's what I would want for my family, friends and myself if, God forbid, the ultimate were to happen.

Most of the time the atmosphere is energetic, bubbly, and full of surprise rather than concentrating on the reason why they all are there.  That fact is acknowledged, but this weekend is to celebrate the children and keep a magical spirit for Christmas and holidays alive during such a difficult season.

Whether it's emotions or the Holy Spirit- my cup runneth over and these moments are not easily forgotten.

The Vow

Oh, Frog Blog...how I've missed you!  I should take more time to tell you what's been going on.  This post will be a short recap as well as a recent discovery.

The last year has been a whirlwind of change and emotion for me.  It has been a lesson in standing up for myself which is harder for me than anything.  I find it so easy to embrace others in all their forms, but doing so for myself seems like a tall, tall mountain.

I am locked in the house for the second day in a row due to #Icemageddon2013.  Cabin fever drove me to watch The Vow and chance that my tears would freeze on contact to my cheeks.  What an amazing love story!  What I love most of all is that Leo never pressures Paige to remember or be anything she isn't.  He is patient and even removes himself from the situation because he sees that it isn't what she wants.  Wow!  

I am a year into my MBA program with another tough year ahead of me.  The program has taught me a lot already.  In fact, I have become aware that I'm pretty bratty when it comes to things being tough.  I have been bad about giving up, quitting or pulling away at times like these rather than pressing on.  It's important for me to continue things that are important to me even if they are tough or I am running into a wall.  I have also learn that I fiercely apply myself once I make up my mind to do so.  

I had the opportunity to be a bridesmaid for a dear friend in October.  I was thrilled to be a part of it!  I have also started working more with SheNOW.  In fact, I am the Social Chair for the organization- planning and organizing social, educational, Bucket List and service events for the group.  I am extremely thrilled to be a part of that because of the growth I can experience, all the networking and social interaction with other strong women.  In fact, the CEO, Brenna Smith, challenged me to experience my friends wedding as a single woman so that I could eventually write (or contribute to) an article about it.  I have enjoyed being a part of a group where the women challenge each other to experience things that might be uncomfortable but encourage growth.  Growth is never easy, but I do think that it is necessary and beneficial.  

I am still volunteering with Soldier's Angels and Snowball Express.  In fact, this coming week is Snowball Express 2013!  I am excited to be a part of it again this year!  My Soldier for 2012 and most of 2013 just made her way home so it's time for me to adopt another.  

I always keep a lot on my plate, but I also do a pretty good job about keeping it all organized and allocated to certain amounts of time.  Some people ask me how I can do so much: work, grad school, volunteer, date and still have friends and family.  I just do!  If you want to see how, be a part of my life.  Those who haven't wanted to see, haven't become a part of it.  Another realization is that men are more intimidated than ever when I divulge that I'm in grad school.  Brenna and I discussed why this could be.  I always thought that having more education would be impressive and make me appear even more dynamic.  Some may feel inadequate by it.  Sure, it's not for everyone.  I don't ask that of everyone in my life or even a man.  I just ask that he have goals that he has set, accomplished and plans to in the future.  If he's only graduated high school yet has a dynamic and robust life full of opportunities, that sounds amazing!  Conversely, he can have a PhD and expect me to be subservient then I'm not in.  

This is me- all of me.  I will be loved, honored and cherished.  Until someone else decides to, I will.  

"Nobody puts Baby in a corner."