Sunday, August 26, 2012

I know why YOU'RE still single and this leads to why I'M still single! Buh-Bye


Aged toad with the spirit of a tadpole- a tragic example of douchebaggery.

I recently dated a mature, rather maturely aged frog, for about three weeks.  10 days of that I spent on vacation with my family.  The dear frog prince and I kept in touch while I was out of town.  He even made plans for a date when I returned!  Thoughtful and impressive indeed! 
That is until he dropped off the face of the Earth.  Ladies, have you ever had that where everything's going fine and then- nothing, not one word!  I know that if a dear frog prince wants to speak to a princess he hops over to her lillipad, texts her iFrogPhone, emails her Macphibian, stops at nothing to get what he desires.  Naturally, I didn't sweat it at first.  Sure, I was concerned and instantly started listing possible reasons as to why.  After about a day and a half I became increasingly frustrated that my dear frog prince had insisted on seeing me, but had broken our plans and now disappeared.  I sent the dear frog prince a text message to his iFrogPhone from mine.  When this was unreturned, I wrote again "what's up?" hoping to at least have an explanation.  When none arrived, I decided to let him have a piece of my mind.  I stated that I was disappointed that he had sought to see me this week, but became unresponsive and wished him good luck in the future.  Sweet, could be seen as passive aggressive, but nonetheless a note showing my disapproval.  No reaction came from these series of messages. 
I had a few glasses of Riesling and a couple fajitas.  It took me about a day to get through the confusion and get to anger.  I ended our Words with Friends game because, after all, we are not friends.  I removed him from facebook, deleted him from my contacts and even updated my SD card so that he would be gone for good!  There would be no chance of me writing again and continuing to irritate myself. 
A couple of days later I received text messages from the bullfrog extraordinaire.  He was "going through a lot, still wanted to see me, and asked if he could call."  Bleeding hearts of the frog pond!  Sorry, dude!  You chose not to respect me enough to acknowledge my communication and provide me with answers PLUS I had a date that night.  I rebounded before that ball even hit the ground!  High five, Princesses!  Anyhow, he continued to send "???".  What?  Are you upset that I'm not acknowledging or participating in communication with you?  Maybe I too "have a lot going on".  It's called life, bullfrog!  Shutting people out doesn't make problems go away or get any worse.  When I got tired of the third set of "???" I responded that he could call if he liked or say whatever he had to via text.  Good choice, sir.  My sarcastic and unforgiving tone is killer via text but it is absolutely undeniably matter-of-fact when heard. 
He responded that his ex, a married woman, reappeared and requested his duties as a boyfriend again.  He was hurt by her and needed to think about it.
Wow, yes, when someone hurts me I immediately give them consideration for another go.  Especially when I've got a perfectly good thing going on.  Nope, ditch that and go back to drama, infidelity, and uncertainty.  That's the road to happiness and sure is exciting, bullfrog.  I'm pretty sure he didn't like that because I got an "understood" back from him. 
I responded with a few tips for him to consider in the future:
  1. Don't hurt someone who hasn't hurt you.
  2. Honesty is always the best policy.
Then I said that I hoped she straightened up for him. 
He reassured me, as much as a typing bullfrog who's given great consideration to return to a relationship with a married woman can give that it is over between them, that I am a great girl, and that he would like to see me.
I never responded, but if I receive "???" my response will have to be "Yes, I am a great girl.  I deserve more than what you have to offer me.  Good day, sir!"
Princesses, this was a hard lesson for me to learn in the past, but no matter what the situation if your dear frog prince has disappointed you and won't apologize, make amends, or offer up a solution to the problem- he is not really interested in working on it.  And if someone cannot communicate through a troubled time, they do not deserve to communicate with you during their good times.  If a dear frog prince refuses to acknowledge a communication sent by you, he is being disrespectful and obviously does not have the cojones of a fruit fly to tell you whatever he thinks will hurt you so badly.  And in the end, yes, it might hurt for a little while.  In my case, I would rather a person shoot straight with me and let me decide what hurts and how to handle it.  It hurts me more to just not know.  Of course, it's usually only for a few days, but it could have been settled sooner.  Lastly, if he is being disrespectful, there is a broken trust and no kind of relationship will work without trust! 
I am proud to say that I have spoken my mind and stood up for myself twice this week!  It feels amazing and I'm wondering 'who is this girl'?  But, I figure that things might suck if I don't say it, things might suck if I do.  I might as well get them out!  I definitely wasn't interested in standing by and having someone think that I am just OK with the situation and go on not knowing my side.  I don't like being a bitch, but I am damn good at when I need to be! 
Amen, pass the salt! 
Keep your head up and your lips puckered, Princesses!  The real dear frog prince doesn't forget how to use his iFrogPhone when shit gets real!
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